1.  Get 'property of Bruce' embroidered on it.
2.  Ride around town on a moped blaring "Born to Be Wild" with a tied on boom box.
3.  Pretend to be Fronzie from Happy Days.
4.  Go around telling everyone that you think you have a chance with Brenda now.
5.  Go to a P.E.T.A. Rally - even they would laugh at that coat.
6.  Buy matching chaps.
7.  See how many bagels will fill the pockets.

any other suggestions