#1 2010-10-07 09:05:15
Number of things found:
Online Pizza Deliveries - 981,875
Pictures of Sweet Brucey - 1,021
Online job listing searches - 0
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#2 2010-10-07 09:07:42
Spell checks performed - 0
Journalism Ethics Databases consulted - 0
Barracuda Jackets Ordered in July - 200
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#3 2010-10-07 09:12:42
Times mouse dropped into the Office Toilet - 507
Bagel related websites consulted - 9,999,999
Twice the Man Shirts Ordered - 1 (before cream cheese habit forced him to upgrade to "Three Times the Man" shirts)
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#4 2010-10-07 09:14:14
Number of Times "Wareham Observer" Site checked - 9 Trillion Bajillion Zillion Times
Site Usually Checked After That - How to Drown Your Sorrows By Shoving Your Fat Face With Free Weiners and Bagels
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#5 2010-10-07 09:38:29
Oh just a disclaimer because Weiner Boy can never take a joke (even though he is one) - everything in this thread is a parody. No one actually audited his cream cheese stain encrusted computer.
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#6 2010-10-07 10:48:29
Thank you Ham. But are you sure no one "audited" his computer? Oh that's right, someone hacked into his computer and the FBI got involved. Or something like that :)
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#7 2010-10-07 12:37:49
I am Hamatron5000.
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#8 2010-10-07 17:39:17
Audit revealed 3 articles on how to pull heads off barbie dolls.
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#9 2010-10-07 18:51:11
Audit revealed local Halifax family put into witness protection program (think trip to Florida amusement park), but when list of 123 suspects proved to be a hoax, family returned home unscathed . . .
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#10 2010-10-07 19:12:36
Audit:
100 reasons why BoBo is totally infatuated with Hamatron And 100 ways to keep Sweet Brucie from learning about the infatuation.
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#11 2010-10-08 01:17:35
Audit:
Two light bulbs (alledgedly for cat lady) = 123 copies of tabloid recovered from undisclosed disposal site = three headless dolls = xxx,xxx,xxx,xxx,xxx Brucie butkissess = one sick puppy
OOOPS, new math protocols indicate the above DOES NOT 'COMPUTE' . . .
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#12 2010-10-08 01:45:17
*****JOURNALISM INTEGRITY ALERT*****JOURNALISM INTEGRITY ALERT*****JOURNALISM INTEGRITY ALERT****
*****This is a test, if there were any actual factual journalism related articles emanating from Halifax harlot, you would have been subject to extreme retching, farting, foaming at the mouth, hives attacks, heart palpitations, and other obnoxious effects *******
We now resume normal programming
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